love letters

Next week will be four years since my love was suddenly taken from this world. I'm feeling it friends. Currently I'm listening to our song "Faithfully" by Journey. No joke. One night during our first year of dating, we were making the 44 minute drive to take me back home when the conversation drifted to picking our song. For some reason (I'm sure I was in charge), the car radio was tuned to the nighttime show hosted by Delilah. You know what I'm talking about. Don't pretend you've never heard of it. If you haven't, it's an uber-dramatic and depressing round of love songs and listener stories. Marcus said the next song that comes on the radio is our song. Unfortunately it was "Faithfully" and now I'm the girl that cries to Journey songs.

Sometimes in my grief I turn to music, to sappy movies, to pictures and to love letters. Marcus wrote many love letters. Writing came naturally to him, but consistency was not his strong suit. Early in our relationship I forced it upon him when during our first summer dating, he went to Shiloh for two months. I gave him a girlfriend writing kit including: notepaper with "Dear Adrienne" at the top, pre-addressed envelopes, and stamps. He also wrote many letters when we were a part during our year of engagement. I was finishing up at Lipscomb and he had started grad school in Cincinnati. The prior are filled with hopes for our relationship while the latter are filled with hopes for our marriage. There also several from when were just friends. One of my favorites is a Christmas card where he told me my friendship was one of the best things in his life. How does a girl not fall in love with that? These letters are such a gift. 

They also include his prayers for me. One in particular I have read often since his death, written the summer of 2003. 

"I know you are having a very difficult time at home. It hurts me that I can't be there to hold you or even just talk about things. I pray that God puts people in your life that you can talk to...It's painful to watch the inner storms you go through and know that I can't do much to help. One thing I've learned from these (shiloh) kids is never to lose hope. Hope that one day God will restore everything that has been broken. Also that peace, love and happiness will always come from the Father." 

I'm so glad God answered then and still continues to answers Marcus's prayer for me. As well as constantly reminding me He is a Lord that restores brokenness. 

During this month of October, I've asked a few of those people God has put in my life to share their memories of Marcus or to share what the Lord has done in their life during the past four years. I can't wait to share them with you.